007: Fervor Friday With Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT Licensed Couple’s Therapist, Sex Therapist, Yoga And Reiki Instructor
We are succulent.
We are juicy, magnetic, and inviting.
We birth and destroy.
We can lead you to erotic ecstasy.
A transcendental realm where divine love unites and waves of bliss wash over you.
We are soft, receptive, and open.
We blossom under your touch.
We bloom from in between our hips, filled with drops of wet dew.
A sacred nectar that is holy and divine.
We are cyclical and we have no fear of darkness.
For the darkest of matter is transmuted in our wombs and yonis.
We are Alchemists of love, life, death, and ecstasy.
We have curves and flesh like that of a ripe peach.
When you merge with us in between our legs, we take your fear, pain, and anguish and transmute it into ecstatic love and erotic union.
We become the holy temple you love to worship.
We anoint your holiest spot with our sacred fluids.
We draw you in, deeper.
We receive you, deeper.
Women are utterly delicious.
It's in our nature.
Sensual, erotic, feminine, beautiful.
We are the temple you pray within and worship yourself through.
We allow you to merge with God/dess.
And we merge there too.
All of us. As One.
Ladies & Gentleman allow me to introduce my soul sister and the kitten’s purrrrr Dr Cat Meyer
Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT is a licensed couple’s therapist, sex therapist, yoga and reiki instructor, and speaker dedicated to evolving the relationship we have surrounding sexuality and our bodies. Dr. Cat integrates various schools of thought including neuroscience, somatic theory, psychology, EMDR trauma therapy, and sexual health in her work for private practice, workshops, and international retreats that are designed to help people create a deeply fulfilling, prosperous relational and sexual life. She is founder of SexLoveYoga.com, an online platform hosting the popular blog and programs for holistic living, sex, and relationships.
Dr. Cat co-hosts Un.done, a women’s slow-flow sensual yoga experience to support dropping into our bodies and learning to feel ourselves from the inside.
She is also the co-creator of Goddess Celebration, an annual large scale women's day retreat held in Malibu, CA, dedicated to uplifting and celebrating the goddess in every women while including the honoring men in the world.
Dr. Cat is host to the popular podcast Eat.Play.Sex on iTunes, in which she brings you expert guests talking on how to ignite your love life both mentally, physically, and relationally. To learn more about her work and any upcoming events or projects, visit her at CatMeyer.com or follow her on Instagram @sexloveyoga.
Who is Dr. Cat Meyer?
I am a playful kitten doctor whose passion for intellect, embodiment, and play creates space and permission for others to question, discover, and own their authentic expression of self and sex. I believe that through the work I have done for my own sexual evolution, I have come to a place of holding pleasure codes to inspire others to their journey.
And in this moment, how do you spend your days?
Mornings are sacred space for me to be attentive to my pleasure and what feels good. A typical day will include meditation, yoga, some form of sensual & energetic practice, dancing around my kitchen, writing pleasure thoughts, and seeing therapy clients. I seek balance in my being. Where there’s stillness I also find movement. Where there’s cognitive, intellectual work, I also find play and embodiment. Where there’s aloneness, I also find social interaction.
I’ve also been traveling solo in the world lately and really creating space for myself to dive in deeper intimacy with myself.
Can you tell us about your upbringing?
I was born and raised in rural Missouri outside of St. Louis to a large German Catholic family. I was the fourth of five kids all just living in their own worlds and interests. I was fortunate to have loving parents who while instilled traditional Catholic values around sex and marriage, were still supportive of my own journey to discovering who I wanted to be. At a young age, I experienced a distressing sexual event that led to hidden depression, eating disorders, and fantasies of death for 11 years, thereafter. Downplaying my sexuality yet simultaneously craving connection and intimacy, I wore shapeless clothing and struggled with depth of friendships and dating. I continued this way throughout college, leading men all the way up to the point of potential sexual encounters before leaving them.
Fast forward and I was 23 when I made my sexual debut to a boyfriend who didn’t even know, and 6 months of being sexually active when I was left by my boyfriend for ‘not being sexually compatible’, raped twice, and contracted STIs and HPV. At which time I was convinced my body was punishing me for my sexuality.
Goddess I see that you are a reiki practitioner, can you share your journey with reiki and do you practice it often?
I met my reiki master teacher when I was 25, about a year after my second rape s a young adult. We did a weekly trade where I would teach him yoga for a professional hands-on massage plus reiki. I recall the first few times of receiving the massage I was hypervigilant of where his hands went and holding so much tension in my body. As our sessions progressed, I became more and more relaxed and allowing. The safety of the space he held and the consistency of our working together completely reprogrammed my body to receiving touch by men. It was during one of those sessions that I asked for a practice with reiki without the massage. After the session, I sat up feeling completely heavy and disoriented. ‘Why do I feel so heavy?’ I asked. ‘Because you haven’t been in your body for a long time. You’re just now realizing how heavy we actually are.’ After that he proceeded to tell me everything that he was able to read from my energetic bodies. He was able to tell me so much about what I had been hiding from the world at that time. Moving forward, I was so fortunate that he took me one as a student for the next two years studying and practicing reiki in-depth. Today my practice is regular whether I’m using symbols to clear and seal rooms, reiki the energetic shifts of my clients, or practicing full sessions with myself or clients.
Goddess I also see that you are a certified yoga teacher, although reiki and yoga seem to go hand in hand how did you decide to become a yoga teacher? What drew you to teach the healing arts of yoga?
I became a yoga instructor at the age of 20 while I was teaching fitness classes at my university. I had always been drawn to the lifestyle and philosophies of peace and wellness that yogis seemed to embody. I also really enjoyed the role of teacher for others, bringing in a more playful attitude to our bodies and movement. I was fortunate that my university helped me pay for my first certification while I worked for them. After that I delved into as much as I could learn about yoga being as I was still living in a small town in Missouri.
Goddess what led you to becoming a certified therapist and wanting to guide people to be sexually empowered (and connected)?
I was a junior in college when I was reading Red magazine about orgasms, when I saw them quote a sex therapist. ‘What? You can be that?’ I thought. Up until this point I had not had been sexually active out of sheer terror of my body’s appearance and intimacy with men. I was reading a lot about sexuality and relationships for my psychology research classes, wanting to learn as much as I could to ‘heal’ the struggles I faced myself. I thought that if I continued learning in the context of graduate school, then I could not only help myself, but eventually help others who may also be fearful and struggling with their sexuality, as well. Following undergraduate college, I studied white tantra at a school in Atlanta Georgia that started my pursuits in the tantric way of life. I then went to my doctorate program for Marriage and Family Therapy in Southern California to better understand relationships and intimacy. From there, I took intensive sexuality trainings through the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists. Since then I’ve studied with multiple tantric teachers internationally, as well as, other alternative sex practices to really come to understand my own self and potential as a sexual being.
Goddess what led you to embrace your own sensuality and why is doing so important?
I was tired of feeling uncomfortable and fearful in my body. I wanted to move more freely. I wanted to play and relax more. I wanted to feel good...so I sought it out. I realized my power and freedom when I embraced my sensuality. No longer did I scan the environment for threat, because I felt a sense of strength and certainty in my own skin. I firmly believe when we come back to our sensuality, we have impact on every other aspect of our lives.
Sex, self-pleasure, deep intimacy… are topics that don’t seem to be as readily or openly accepted by society yet. Why is this?
I believe that so many of us are fearful of truly being seen. We crave intimacy and to truly be seen and understood, yet we are also afraid of someone seeing the shadows and less socially desirable parts, too. We seek to belong, yet worry of rejection and therefore engage in safety behaviors to avoid the potential.
I believe that many of us experience anxiety around pleasure. To experience pleasure, we must be able to let go in the body, which simultaneously opens our sensory receptors to receive more. Many of us are afraid to let go, so any experience of energy expanding as pleasure through the body can cause us to contract, clamp down in order to contain control again.
Goddess how did you come up with the idea of brining sex, love and yoga together in a most blissful threesome?
Yoga asana, pranayama, and mindfulness were the tools from which I was able to come back to my body, calm my nervous system, and feel again. The philosophies and ways of yogic living also provided for a more balanced, self-compassionate, and peaceful being. From this place of embodiment and mindfulness, my love and sex life could flourish.
Goddess what does sexual healing mean to you?
Sexual healing is the undoing of the moral, medical, and media messages programmed into us that sex, our bodies, and our expression of both must look a certain way. It’s the reprogramming of our negative past sexual experiences and traumas that have created contraction in our body impacting our ability to fully surrender into what feels good.
Goddess can you tell us more about Un-Done and the art of sensual yoga?
Un.done was born from my own personal story of sexual trauma and unhealthy view and treatment of my own body. Yoga was the first time I could recall feeling safe and relaxed in my own skin and the start of my journey to becoming open and full of my own authentic expression. Un.done is a sensual yoga class designed to get us to slow down, touch, and feel our bodies from the inside. We release the pressure to move a certain way or have a perfect alignment. What makes this class unique is that we come together to practice in our underwear, letting go of self judgment and getting to know what it feels like for our skin to touch skin as we move the way our body wants to. My style of teaching gets us to slow. it. all. down. so we can better connect within ourselves creating stronger interoceptive awareness--a person’s ability to detect their own internal bodily sensations. Bringing women to be more aware of their internal body cues may decrease external body awareness, or objectification of our own bodies. The music journey is lead by singer and song producer Ell Kay whose sensual and rhythmic beats supports the grounded, yet liquid experience.
Goddess do you have any advice for females on how to utilize their sexual energy?
Sexual energy is cultivated and moved through the body when we can open the body and release into deeper layers of relaxation. Seeking, forcing, pressing, suppressing, tensing, can cause blocks in the physical and thus energetic bodies. When we can allow our jaw to drop, release our shoulders, let go of our belly, relax our pelvic floor, the breath can carry the energy up and through more easily.
Goddess, when you are caught up in your head or just really busy / distracted in life, how do you get back to earth (and into your body)?
One of my favorite ways to get back into my body is yoga. Whether it’s a simple hip opening stretch or breath work in-between clients, or a full sequence or class, yoga helps me to ground back down.
Goddess do you have a favorite ritual?
I have a journal in which I had started an incantation the morning after leaving a disconnected and disheartening sexual experience with my then boyfriend. In my journal I started with the sentence “I choose myself powerfully” followed by a few statements affirming my power and creatrix. Moving forward, whenever I would bring this journal back out, I would add a new line of affirmation to reinvigorate my being’s truth.
Goddess can you share some tips for embracing sensuality and being sexually empowered?
Be your own brand of sexy. We all may struggle at some point with accepting and celebrating our bodies. We all may struggle at some point with taking up space for ourselves. We all might fear our own voice and power and what this can do. But that’s only because we think that someone else knows better than we do what the ‘right’ way is. Be inspired by one another’s ability to express, yet let that simply be the permission, the fire starter, for your personal journey into your infinite potential.
Cat (meow) , thank you for sharing your time and energy with us where can the Kinktra lovers find you?